- Image via Wikipedia
Bristol Palin and Mama have done it again, just when we thought they had both turned a new chapter in life it turns out it was all just a rehearsal for more of the same. The Bristol-Levi show has always been a minor sideshow in the drama that is the Palin family, but it threatens to overshadow the main event as Mama prepares to refine her political campaign from looks and attitude to—well, more of the same. It feels as though we’re sitting here, two years later, watching a rerun of a pilot series that didn’t quite make it through the fall season.
Two years later and Bristol was back with Levi, if only for a short time, this time insisting that he get his high school diploma and not rely on a career posing for Playgirl. Sarah was also back, collecting political chits through endorsements and fundraising, this time without the powder-puff hairdo—and this we can only hope—without the winks.
How do we end up in a rut and keep repeating the same mistakes? Bristol and Sarah aren’t the only ones—we’ve all been there. Sometimes it’s very hard to leave the past behind so we fall back onto behaviors that we’re comfortable with, even though they haven’t served us well. Better the devil you know than the one you don’t . . .
The psychological baggage we carry through life is sticky stuff that won’t rub off without a lot of work. Experts will tell you that no one gets out of the playground without a few psychological scars and they can add up over time. After awhile, we get used to carrying around the extra weight and may even cease to be aware of it.
As an FBI undercover agent, my job was to recruit foreign spies to work for the U.S. government. I worked with the FBI Behavioral Science Unit and one of my first objectives was to determine the emotional and psychological baggage that the targets of my investigation were carrying with them.
Checked Luggage or Carry-On?
- Image by Huzzah Vintage via Flickr
It’s one thing to be saddled with luggage that comes from deep scars that are tough to unload. It’s another to haul it around as carry-on simply because we don’t want to take the time to sort through it, look at it honestly in the face, and unpack what isn’t working for us anymore.
What is your most important carry-on item? The mind-set you bring with you. When you’ve made a mistake, what can you learn from it? OK, it can be embarrassing to make a mistake, but it’s more embarrassing to repeat it.
Got it, Sarah?
What You Don’t Know Really Can Hurt You
Individuals who understand themselves are better able to interpret their responses. They can see negative patterns and change their behavior to avoid repeating the same mistakes.
Information makes you savvy. What you don’t know about yourself can hurt you as you unpack the carry-on luggage you don’t need. You can be caught unaware—isn’t that why you always pack too much—and left unable to cope with the unexpected in life.
Understand, Bristol?
If Only You Could See Yourself
Have you ever seen a photo of yourself and cringed? You scream, “I don’t look like that!” And yet, you did look exactly like that at the moment the photo was taken. It’s natural to desire a flattering image, but sightings of yourself as you appear to others are not always pleasant. Try these tactics:
Notice when another person unintentionally mirrors you. Family, close friends, and colleagues are good sources. A glimpse of yourself might happen when someone expresses an opinion in a similar way or uses an expression that you’ve used in the past. Is this an attractive image for you? Another opportunity for an accidental sighting of yourself is when people intentionally imitate you. Does it present the image you want to maintain?
This one applies to both Bristol and Mama.
TIP: Think about and relive those moments when you responded in ways that made you stand straighter and with more dignity. You drew from a well that is deep and untapped. You got it right before; you can do it again.
“If I had my life to live over . . . I’d dare to make more mistakes next time.”
Nadine Stair
Take Away
Maps are charted through a series of mistakes. Trial and error makes it possible to plot exact directions for your destination. You’ll never find your way unless you know which road NOT to take.
What “mistake” has ultimately led you on a better path?
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Tags: BristolPalin, FBI, FBI Behavioral Science Unit, mistakes, psychological baggage, Sarah Palin
